


If Only Platonic Love Counted

by Tao_the_Keychain_Kid



Category: Kingdom Hearts (Video Games)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Blood, Cussing, Death, Don't Like Don't Read, Everyone Is Gay, Feels, Gore, Hanahaki Disease, I'm Bad At Tagging, I'm Bad At Titles, M/M, Major Character Injury, Sad, Sad Ending, Sora is big sad, Unrequited Love, Vanitas is Love-Sick, Vanitas is big sad, Vanitas just wanted Sora to be happy, Ventus is big sad, everyone is sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-14
Updated: 2020-07-14
Packaged: 2021-03-04 17:54:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,845
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25260466
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tao_the_Keychain_Kid/pseuds/Tao_the_Keychain_Kid
Summary: Vanitas has the Hanahaki Disease, but the person he's in love with likes someone else.I just wanted to write something with the Hanahaki disease, so take my sucky and sad story lol
Relationships: Riku/Sora (Kingdom Hearts), Sora & Vanitas (Kingdom Hearts), Vanitas & Ventus (Kingdom Hearts)
Kudos: 22





	If Only Platonic Love Counted

It's been about three weeks since Vanitas's symptoms started. He had simply coughed up a flower petal and immediately knew what it was. He had hated it, ripped it to shreds and stomped on it, hoping it would just go away. He knew who it was for. He knew the person behind his new illness. But Vanitas knew he could never tell him. He had never wanted to be Sora's friend in the first place. He avoided him, made fun of him, and outright told Sora to fuck off multiple times. But the brunette never gave up, and it was Sora's pure persistence that finally made the friendship between the two boys blossom. Vanitas had just given up, deciding that maybe once he accepted Sora's friendship Sora would stop annoying him with his stubbornness.

That was partially accurate, Sora did become less annoying, but that could've been for another reason. One Vanitas didn't want to recognize, one he didn't want to accept, one that his current reality was forcing him to realize. Sora is still the same, it's just Vanitas's feelings that changed. Vanitas made sure Sora never knew about it, though. Never let himself give any sort of signs that he had feelings for him or the cursed Hanahaki disease. Vanitas just simply accepted that he was going to die, knowing Sora would never return his feelings. Which leads us to right now, at 2 in the morning, at Vanitas's front door. He was tired and a bit grumpy but when Sora called sounding frantic, he couldn't just deny the brunette from coming over. Vanitas stepped aside so Sora could enter and watched him closely when he walked in, noting Sora looked as panicked as he had sounded on the phone. "So what's the problem?" Vanitas asked while closing his door, turning to the distressed brunette. 

Sora pulled a bloodied flower petal from his pocket and showed it to Vanitas with a shaking hand. "I-I think I have the...th-the Hanahaki disease," Sora's voice displayed the terror he was feeling and Vanitas tensed. Sora is suffering from the disease too? Sora is in love? Vanitas felt pangs of jealousy and pain throughout his chest. "What? Did this just happen?" Vanitas tried to hide his growing concern for Sora by keeping a level tone. Sora nodded frantically, "Just a while ago. I-I didn't know what to do. You were the first person to come to mind and I-I figured you'd be awake so I called." Vanitas nodded, a tiny sense of hope filling him when Sora said he was the first person to cross Sora's mind during such a panic. 

"Do you have any idea who it's for?" He asked, silently hoping it was him. Sora nodded slowly, "I-I think so. But I don't think I could tell him, it could ruin our friendship!" Sora looked down and crushed the small flower petal in his hand. Vanitas frowned, seeing Sora so down and panicked didn't give him a good feeling. "Well who is it?" He asked, once again hoping it was him so both he and Sora could be cured. "R-Riku…" Sora's response hit Vanitas like a freight train. He wasn't surprised, he had expected this outcome, but the weight of it really happening, the actual word leaving Sora's mouth was just too painful. 

Sora's body started trembling a bit harder and he started sniffling. Vanitas knew he was crying, but he didn't know what to do. He wasn't good at feelings and the crushing realization of his unrequited love was taking a toll on him. Sora threw his arms around Vanitas in a tight embrace as he cried, "I-I know you don't like hugs b-but...What am I going to d-do? Riku's m-my best friend and I-I don't want to ruin that...But I don't want to die, either!" Vanitas slowly wrapped his arms around Sora, resisting his body's need to cough, knowing what would come out. He couldn't risk Sora finding out. Especially not at a moment like this. Vanitas held Sora tightly as the boy sobbed, not knowing what to do about either of their situations.

"I think you should talk to him," Vanitas spoke, tightening his grip on Sora's frame slightly. Sora shook his head, "B-But Vani...I don't want to risk it." Vanitas's body was screaming internally from the urge to cough, his throat burning and itching with the blood and petals slowly rising. Vanitas kept it back as much as he could, his heart aching with Sora's use of his nickname. "Do you want to die, Sora?!" Vanitas didn't mean to shout. But in the midst of his raging emotions he couldn't control the outburst. "Do you really think Riku wouldn't like you back?! Do you really think DYING is worth it?! Just because you're scared he'll reject you?!" 

He isn't really one to talk given his situation, and maybe he was speaking to both himself and to Sora. But Vanitas knew how this would end. He's seen the way Riku sneaks glances at Sora. He's seen how they act when they're together. He's always secretly known. Maybe that was why accepting his inevitable death was a bit easier. He had seen it coming since a mile away. Sora looked at Vanitas, tears stinging his eyes. "Do you really think he'd accept me…?" His trembling voice asked, tears falling down his cheeks. "Yes, I do. Have you not seen how he looks at you, Sora? I can almost guarantee that he loves you back." Vanitas's response hurt him so bad. The pain welling in his chest was horrid, the words like knives stabbing into him. He knew it was the truth, though. And that fact hurt him much more. Sora buried his face into Vanitas's chest, crying harder, not sure. Vanitas held Sora tighter, continuing, "You'll be okay. I know that he feels the same about you. You won't die, Sora. You just need to tell him." Vanitas guided Sora to his couch and sat down with him, wiping Sora's tears as he forced the boy to look at him. "Promise me you'll try," he said, his golden eyes hiding his pain as he stared into teary blue ones.

Sora nodded slowly, knowing he didn't really have a choice unless he wanted to die. Sora knew that at least trying meant his death wasn't certain. "I'm going to go get us some waters, okay? Calm down." Vanitas got up and walked to his kitchen, using this chance to finally allow his body to cough out the petals and blood that were bringing about his eventual demise. He coughed up as much as he could and wiped his mouth and hands clean. He wrapped the petals in some paper towels and threw them into the trash. Grabbing two waters he made his way back to the boy on his couch. He handed Sora one and Sora took it gratefully. Vanitas quickly grabbed a box of tissues and passed it to Sora, sitting back down beside him. "Thank you…" Vanitas nodded in response and took a drink of his water while Sora blew his nose. Vanitas felt horrible having to see Sora like this. 

"You should take my bed. I can sleep here for the night," Vanitas turned his gaze to the side, his chest still aching from the events of the last half hour. "N-No, I couldn't. This is your house and you were kind enough to let me come over-" Sora began but was quickly silenced by Vanitas. "I said take the bed. You need to rest. I'll be fine. It's late and we both need sleep." Sora knew arguing with him would be pointless so he simply nodded and stood, smiling lightly at Vanitas. "Thank you again for your help, Vani." Vanitas nodded, the pain becoming unbearable for a few seconds. "It's no problem. Now go get some sleep." Sora nodded and left Vanitas in the living room, knowing where Vanitas's room was. 

Vanitas stayed up on the couch for a while longer, waiting until he knew Sora probably wouldn't hear to let his body hack out the petals and blood that had built up in his throat once again. Vanitas knew his death was rapidly approaching thanks to Sora telling Vanitas about his feelings for Riku. Vanitas was almost sure the flowers in his lungs would grow at double speed after the events of tonight. He slowly laid down, the familiar feeling of sadness washing over him. He'd have to subtly tell Sora and the others goodbye. Start planning what things he wanted to leave people, if he even wanted to leave anybody anything. The only two people he was actually friends with were Sora and Ventus. Ventus if you could even call him a friend. Vanitas only really talked to him because he kind of had too. He wondered what Sora would do once he was gone. Would Sora miss him? _….Probably not._ _There probably isn't a single person who would miss me._ Vanitas sighed and closed his eyes, deciding he could always think about these things when Sora isn't in the next room over. Vanitas felt the tears welling up in his eyes. He needed to cry but refused, trying to force sleep instead.

~~~

It's been a few days since Sora showed up at Vanitas's house, and Sora decided today would be the day he'd confess to Riku. Vanitas had helped him get the confidence he needed, so he was finally going to act on it. The flower petals he coughed up increased a little since he tried to ignore it and it scared the hell out of him, so Sora decided he'd get a few of his friends together to hang out and then sneak off with Riku to tell him. It was a pretty good plan, it seemed innocent enough. Just Sora hanging out with his friends. He figured having them around would help a little. Vanitas had wanted to offer some support for Sora, so he agreed to go. But only after the brunette begged him for like 30 minutes. Sora told him the plan, he would go with Vanitas and then hopefully leave with Riku. Vanitas didn't want to go for his own reasons, didn't want this to happen at all, but even if Vanitas confessed to Sora it's not like his feelings would be returned. He'd only make the sweet boy feel insanely guilty and Vanitas didn't want that. 

At the current moment Vanitas was driving with Sora in his car to where the friends agreed to meet up. They'd spend the day in town doing various things, shopping at the mall, maybe going to feed the ducks at the pond and have a picnic at the park or something, and then they'd end it with a trip to the beach. Sora planned to confess at the beach since it reminded him of all the fun times he'd spent with Riku and Kairi growing up. If he was being honest, Vanitas wasn't sure how he was going to hide his illness from everyone. He figured if he really needed it he'd leave early and say it was a cold. Sora looked over at Vanitas and smiled. "Thank you for helping me, Vani, I really appreciate it!" Oh God. Vanitas felt the familiar pain of heartbreak surge throughout his body. He was slowly becoming accustomed to it, given the events of the past few days. He just had to accept it. There wasn't anything else he could do. Not like he could afford the surgery to have the plant removed from his lungs anyway. He nodded and offered Sora a small smile, something he found he only ever did with Sora. Sora seemed to calm down a bit more, relaxing against the car seat and looking at the passing buildings. 

"Are you ready?" Vanitas asked, trying to find some sort of happiness for Sora. If Sora would be happy, then maybe he can be happy too. For as long as he has left, at least. Sora nodded, voice displaying the confidence the boy had managed to build up, "Yeah! I'm gonna tell him and then we'll be together! ...Hopefully." Vanitas felt it, the few petals in his throat, waiting to come out. He nodded and gave Sora a reassuring look. "You got this." Sora smiled and nodded back, becoming more excited than nervous. Vanitas once again tried to make himself happy with the fact that Sora would be happy, but it was really difficult. Thankfully they pulled into the mall parking lot and Vanitas was finally able to cough a little with everyone so distracted. Sora had immediately run over to Riku, Kairi, Naminé, Xion, and Roxas. Ventus showed up with Aqua and Terra a little while later, apparently Aqua and Terra wanted to come along because they had wanted to go shopping for a while. Vanitas hoped the others would ignore him so he could leave silently, but that wasn't the case as Ventus apparently wanted to talk to him.

"I'm surprised Sora managed to drag your ass here," Ven said, walking next to Vanitas. Vanitas rolled his eyes, not wanting to conversate with the blond. "I only came because he begged," he responded coldly, hoping his tone would make it obvious to Ventus that he didn't want to talk. Ventus was used to this however and didn't budge, staying by the black-haired boy's side. "He must've really wanted you to come then," Ven said, glancing at Sora. Vanitas looked at Sora too, seeing how happy he was talking to Riku and Kairi. He felt the need to cough again but suppressed it. He had been practicing the last few days on how to hold out as long as he could, so he wouldn't be suspicious to the others, especially Sora. But fuck it sure wasn't easy. 

"That's just how he is, you know that," came Vanitas's response, looking away from the happy trio. Ventus nodded, "That's true. Hey, so Aqua and Terra brought me, but they're only here to shop, so once we leave I might need to hitch a ride with you." _So that's what this is about._ Vanitas gave one of his classic 'are you fucking serious' looks and Ventus sighed. "I know, I'm sorry. But please?" Vanitas groaned, "Why me? You're friendly with, like, everyone here. Hitch a ride with Naminé." 

"Come on Vanitas, please? We don't live too far from each other so if I just go with you then dropping me off won't be such a burden," Ventus pleaded. "Besides, we can get along fine enough for a few short car rides," the blond finished. Vanitas rolled his eyes as he grunted a 'Fine.' "Thanks dude, I appreciate it," Ventus hit Vanitas's back as a friendly gesture and then caught up with Aqua and Terra. That kind of complicates things. Vanitas was counting on leaving alone since he wouldn't have to worry about giving his secret away. _Well, Ventus probably won't care. This will probably be fine._ Vanitas stayed a bit behind the group the whole time, following them to a few stores before he realized he couldn't hold it back anymore. He quickly went to the bathroom, hoping no one noticed his disappearance. Unbeknownst to him, Ventus noticed the urgency of which Vanitas had left the store. Thinking it was odd, Ven just shrugged it off, thinking Vanitas might've just been having stomach problems. Ven made a mental note to ask later if he needed anything. 

Vanitas quickly ran into the restroom, hacking loudly as lots of blood and little flowers left his mouth. _They're flowers now?! How fast is this damn thing growing?!_ Vanitas continued, hoping his body got as much out as possible. He knew he couldn't keep this up all day. The guy who came out to wash his hands looked at Vanitas with sadness. "I feel for you dude, I hope you can take care of that soon," the man said, washing his hands. Vanitas simply glared, not needing any words of pity or sympathy from a stranger. The man grabbed some paper towels for Vanitas and patted his back as he hacked and coughed. Once Vanitas was done the man handed him the paper towels and Vanitas managed to get out a gruff 'thanks' in response. He wiped his mouth and washed his hands and face. "Good luck dude, I hope things get better for you," and with that the man left.

Vanitas glared, gaze directed at the sink. There was no hope for him. He didn't have enough money for that ridiculously expensive surgery, and Sora was literally going to confess to Riku **today.** Hope didn't exist in this equation, there was no room for it. Vanitas waited a few minutes for his strength to return, his body had gone a bit weak after the horrid coughing fit. He waited for another fit, knowing this wouldn't be over until his death. He wanted to get as much out as he could,. Maybe that'd help him hide it later. A few more petals made their way out of his body and he figured that would be it for a while. He left the bathroom silently, lungs burning from the previous fit. He made his way back to the group, debating on whether he should just head to a different store or maybe even leave when Naminé saw him. She ran over, "Oh good! Sora saw you were missing and got worried you left." _Well there goes that._ "Yeah, needed the bathroom, sorry."

Naminé nodded, "That's what we had told him. I'm glad you didn't leave." _Glad?_ "Why?" Vanitas asked, "We aren't exactly friends." Naminé laughed lightly, "Your bluntness never ceases to amaze me, Vanitas. Sora just seemed really worried, and you know I would like to be your friend." Vanitas frowned grimly, "It's a little late for that, Naminé, sorry to disappoint." She gave him a confused and hurt look. "What do you mean, Van? Do you really not want to be my friend that bad?" He shook his head no. "It's not that. Just something else. All I'm saying is if you had wanted to be friends with me you could've tried a lot sooner," he responded. _You have no idea how late you are, Naminé. I don't have much time left._

She frowned and nodded, not really knowing what this was about, but the intensity of Vanitas's voice and his overall grim aura told her he was probably right. The two walked in silence as they joined the group, Sora happily throwing an arm around Vanitas's shoulders. "You didn't leave!" Vanitas's chest tightened painfully and he looked at the brunette, "Obviously not. You wanted me here, so I'm here." Sora smiled, patting his back before rejoining Riku's side. The group made their way through the mall, stopping at various stores, Vanitas once again trying to stay towards the back. Soon enough the group headed back to the parking lot with their bags, ready to head to the park. The group said bye to Aqua and Terra and sure enough Ventus followed Vanitas to his car. Vanitas frowned, hoping the blond had convinced Naminé to give him a ride instead. 

They got in after tossing their bags to the back and Vanitas strapped himself in, the urge to cough making itself painfully aware. _I had managed to survive this long, just a bit longer._ "So," Ventus's voice filled the car as he put his seatbelt on, "Are you okay? Do you need anything?" Vanitas didn't look at him and just gave a bored 'Hmm?' in response. "You went to the bathroom pretty quick, seemed urgent." Vanitas quickly snapped his head to look at Ventus, startling the blond, "I-I was just wondering if your stomach was upset or something!" Vanitas visibly relaxed a little, tone still gruff, "No, I'm fine. Thanks." Ventus stared at the boy for a bit longer before turning his gaze to the window. "If you need anything don't be afraid to ask, I heard Naminé keeps spare medicines in her car," Ven said, trying to ease the tension in the car. He wasn't expecting Vanitas to act so surprised, what was so bad? If it was just a stomach problem then why that reaction? Stomach issues are normal. Ventus didn't understand why it warranted that intense of a reaction from the ravenette. "I said I'm fine, Ven," 

Vanitas's voice was a little on edge and he didn't mean it to come out that way. This made Ventus a bit more suspicious, why was Vanitas being so damn defensive? Ventus decided to just ignore it for the time being, not wanting Vanitas to stop the car and kick him out. Ven distracted himself with his phone while Vanitas turned the radio on, also disliking the tension in the air. It was full of apprehensiveness, and he didn't exactly mean for that to happen. He had thought no one noticed him, he had tried to leave calmly but the urgency of the coughing fit was sudden. He wasn't expecting it, it was there but it had disappeared for a while. So when it suddenly came back he was surprised, it wasn't his fault. _I need to be more careful next time, I know this brat is suspicious now._ Thankfully the park came into sight and he turned into the entrance, knowing he'd need to secretly look for the whereabouts of the bathroom. He knew he was going to need to head there soon, the taste of blood filling his mouth. Wouldn't be long before another bad fit started. Ven and Van left the car, both boys carrying what Sora told them to bring for the picnic. Ventus had managed to remember to get it from Aqua's car before she left. They joined everyone and they all walked to the pond.

"I think right here would be good," Kairi motioned to the area around them. "Yeah, the pond's right there and it's nice and grassy here," Roxas agreed. Everyone sat after Riku put the blanket down. The different foods were passed around and Vanitas struggled to keep the flowers at bay. A bit of blood left his mouth but he luckily wiped it before the others could see. He quickly stood, rushing to the bathroom he saw on the way in. "Where you going, Vani?" Sora called. Vanitas called back a quick, "Bathroom!" before breaking into a full on sprint. Talking wasn't the smartest thing he could've done, the blood covered his hands, a small petal in the middle of it. Ventus stood, "I'm gonna go check on him." The others nodded, shocked at Vanitas's actions. _He literally_ **_ran_ ** _this time. He's hiding something. Something's wrong._ Ventus thought, following Vanitas to the bathroom. As Ventus neared the bathroom, the sounds of severe coughing were heard. Ventus swung the door open, rushing inside, finding Vanitas at the sink struggling to stand as his body shook. Blood and flowers left his mouth. Ventus's eyes widened, was this really happening? Vanitas is in love?! He has the Hanahaki disease?!

"Vanitas!! Oh my God are you okay?!" Ventus helped Vanitas stand, shocked by the intensity of it. This had to have been going on for a long time already. Vanitas couldn't respond, lungs and chest on fire as more flowers and petals left his trembling frame. The metallic taste of his own blood was nauseating, and he got ready to hurl as he hacked out a large flower, shoving Ventus away as he rushed into one of the stalls. Ventus followed, not able to help as Vanitas crashed against the toilet, throwing up. There was so much blood. Ventus could only stare in horror as Vanitas continued vomiting. Ventus felt time slow as he turned to the sinks where Vanitas's blood, large flowers, and lots of petals covered the once porcelain white sink. 

Ventus went over to the sink and picked up one of the flowers, it was big, almost the size of his palm. That was **way** too big for this to have only started now. Just how long had Vanitas been dealing with this?! Ventus started cleaning up the mess at the sink, not knowing what else he could do to help. Vanitas slowly stopped and rested against the stall wall. Ventus went over to him once he stopped, having cleaned most of the blood and thrown most of the flowers away. He was still holding the largest one in his hand, shocked by just how big it was. "Vanitas why didn't you tell me?! Does **anyone** know about this?!" Ventus yelled. He was angry and terrified, he and Vanitas may not have been on the best terms for most of their lives, but he still cared very deeply about him. Vanitas said and did nothing in response, catching his breath, struggling with the pain his body was in. "How long has this been going on?"

Ven's question was met with silence. "How long, Vanitas?!" He asked again, moving closer to the boy sitting on the bathroom floor. Vanitas answered quietly, "It doesn't matter, Ventus." "What?!" Ventus's voice was filled with the three emotions he felt the strongest, the adrenaline making his voice loud as his tone dripped with anger, fear, and worry. Vanitas slowly stood using the wall for support, yelling back, "I said it doesn't matter!" Ventus couldn't wrap his head around it. Was Vanitas seriously giving up? Did he really already accept death? "Look at the size of this flower, Vanitas! It's almost as big as my fucking hand! You're going to **die,** Vanitas!" Ventus was yelling. Vanitas was sure the people outside the bathroom could hear. He merely hoped it wasn't any of their friends. 

"HE'S IN LOVE WITH SOMEBODY ELSE, VEN!!" Vanitas screamed back, tone heavy with annoyance, sadness, and heartbreak. Ventus stared at the ravenette in shocked silence as Vanitas started crying. His voice cracked and got weak, "He loves somebody else…" Vanitas's legs gave out and Ventus quickly caught him, sinking to the floor with the boy in his arms. Vanitas was crying, he knew it would happen eventually. No matter how much he pushed it back, he knew he would break eventually. He had just hoped it would've been while he was alone. Ventus didn't know what to say. He was shook down to his core. He could only hold Vanitas's weak, sobbing frame. This entire situation pissed Vanitas off. He should've never let Sora convince him to come. He should've never fallen in love in the first place.

Vanitas tried to stop crying but his eyes wouldn't stop producing tears. "Y-You...You can't just die, Van," Ventus's voice broke a little. "You need to at least try!" Vanitas glared at him fiercely, tears streaming down his cheeks. "He's going to confess to the person he loves **today** , Ven. This evening. He has the disease too," Vanitas's tone started out with anger but then softened down to pure sadness. Ventus felt his eyes water and he tightened his grip on Vanitas. "You can't just give up! W-We can all pool our m-money together so you can get the surgery-" Vanitas cut Ventus off, "No, Ven. It's okay with me, really. I just don't want him to feel bad about this, I don't want to ruin his confession...Please promise me you won't tell anyone, Ven." Ventus looked into Vanitas's pain-filled eyes, a few tears running down his own cheeks. "B-But Vanitas-" Ventus was cut off by the golden-eyed boy once again. "Please, Ven. Please…"

Ventus started crying as he held Vanitas close to him. He didn't want to accept this. _I'm going to talk to the others about the money, I have to find a way!_ Ventus's mind was racing with thoughts about how he could pull it off, but as he looked into Vanitas's eyes again, he could see the pain and the love Vanitas felt for whoever gave him this horrible disease. "Please…" The sadness in Vanitas's voice was too much for Ventus to bear. He cried, knowing that this was probably Vanitas's final wish. He was torn between respecting it and trying to save Vanitas. He didn't know what to do. 

Vanitas wiped away both his tears and Ven's, reminding him that the others were outside and that they needed to pull it together. Ventus couldn't believe how well Vanitas was handling this. How long has Vanitas hidden his suffering? How much has Vanitas suffered? Ventus forced himself to stop crying and the boys freshened themselves up at the sinks. Their eyes gave it away, but they figured if they were confident enough the others wouldn't ask. Vanitas did his best to walk on his own, sides and torso throbbing with pain. The others looked relieved to see them but worry was still apparent on their features. Sora was the first to react, quickly rushing over to Vanitas. "Are you okay? What happened?" Sora's voice was laced with worry. _Don't do this to me, Sora._ _Don't look at me like that. Don't give me hope that you could possibly love me._ Vanitas offered him a small smile, "I had to puke, sorry. My stomach just isn't doing too well today." Vanitas did his best to sound confident and reassuring. Ventus watched the way Vanitas softened around Sora and he instantly knew it was him. He already knew who Sora would be confessing to, that much was obvious. Riku. Sora's best friend. 

As Ventus watched Vanitas reassure the group that he was okay, he remembered Vani saying that Sora has the disease too. Sora's infection with the illness must have been new as he looked nowhere near as bad as Vanitas. Ventus also realized that if Vanitas knew that Sora would be confessing today, then that means they talked about it. He also remembered that Sora and Vanitas came in the same car. He couldn't believe it. His eyes filled with tears again as he thought about just how damn strong Vanitas is. Vanitas still stayed around Sora, still helped Sora, still suffered through his own pain while hiding it from Sora. The more Ventus thought about it, the more painful the thought of Vanitas's demise became. 

He fought back the tears for Vanitas's sake and forced a smile. He pretended as best as he could for the rest of the picnic. It went well enough, everyone eating and having a good time. Ventus kept an eye on Vanitas and noticed how much he really struggled. It would have gone unnoticed by anyone who wasn't paying attention. But for Ventus, with his watchful eyes paying very close attention to Vanitas, it was clear. He saw the tightening of Vanitas's throat, the way he swallowed frequently as though pushing it back as much as possible. It was painful for Ventus too. He knew there wasn't a way he could help.

Vanitas noticed his staring and shot him a glare, trying to remind him to not make the others suspicious. Ventus looked away, instead trying to turn his attention to eating his food. Riku and Sora finished their food and Sora dragged Riku over to the pond. Kairi, Xion, and Naminé soon followed, leaving Roxas, Vanitas, and Ventus alone. "Aren't you going to go too, Rox?" Vanitas asked, looking at the blond. Roxas smiled and shook his head no, "My feet hurt from the mall. I'd rather chill here with you two, if you don't mind." Vanitas shook his head no and Ventus said a soft, "Of course not, feel free." Roxas laid down on the grass making small conversation with the two boys. Roxas did the most talking and Ventus did the most responding. Vanitas only talked when he wanted to and tried to ignore the soon-to-be couple that was currently throwing bread at the ducks and geese. 

Eventually midday turned into early evening and the group made their way to the beach. Once they were in Vanitas's car, he didn't bother holding it back. Vanitas coughed and hacked and blood and flowers got all over his steering wheel and dashboard. "Okay, fuck no. Get your ass out of the driver's seat, I'm driving," Ventus opened his door and got out, making his way to Vanitas's door. "I'll be fine, Ven." Vanitas wiped the blood off his wheel and sighed, getting out when he saw Ventus's face. "You're lucky I'm not taking you to the hospital. Which is what we **should** do, by the way!" Vanitas glared and got in on the passenger's side. "You promised, Ven," he reminded him. "Yeah, yeah," Ventus sat down and started the car, they were now the last out of the group to leave. 

Once they got to the beach, they saw everyone waiting for them, towels and blankets already set up. "Are you going to be alright?" Ventus looked over at Vani with concern and sadness. Vanitas nodded. "If I feel it coming again I'll go to the bathroom. Just cover for me, okay?" Ventus sighed. "Fine." _But I'm taking you to the hospital tomorrow._ Ventus knew if he told the ravenette that he would never hear the end of it. They made their way over, seeing everyone else had basically gotten in the water already. Roxas smiled at them, "So you guys coming or what?" He flung his shirt off, looking excited. Ventus smiled and nodded, looking at Vanitas. Roxas and Ventus both took their pants off, both having already prepared with shorts on under. "Oh I can't, I forgot my swimming trunks at home, sorry Rox." Vanitas responded. Roxas smirked at him while Ventus took his shirt off. "Pathetic excuse, Vani. I brought an extra pair of shorts in case this happened," Roxas grabbed Vanitas's wrist and sprinted off to Naminé's car. 

"I'm kind of glad you didn't bring any, Vani, I forgot to lock my door when I got out so I had to come back anyway," Roxas threw the door open and reached into his picnic bag. Vanitas had a sour face, obviously not pleased with this situation. Roxas passed the shorts to Vanitas. "See? I even brought black ones in case you pulled that crap." Vanitas smirked, both impressed and amused. He was still mad about it though. "Thanks, Rox. Can always count on you, huh?" Roxas laughed, making sure to lock the door this time and shut it. "Hey dude, there's a butterfly on your shoulder," Roxas pointed to Vanitas's right shoulder. Vanitas looked, noticing it's vibrant purple color. "Oh wait, I've heard that a purple butterfly is a bad omen! Like death!" Roxas gasped, continuing, "And it's on your right shoulder!!! Dude you better pray or something, I think you're fucked!" Vanitas's expression went slightly grim. _Oh you don't know the half of it, Roxas._

They made their way back to the beach and Vanitas went to the bathroom to change. "Where's Vani, Rox?" Kairi asked. Roxas smiled, "Changing! I knew he wouldn't bring a pair of trunks to swim so I brought him some." Xion laughed, "Good call, Roxas!" Xion, Kairi, and Naminé were hitting around a beach ball and Sora and Riku were having diving battles, testing who could hold their breath the longest. Roxas got into the water and started a splash fight with Ventus while Vanitas coughed up as many flowers as he could in the bathroom. He changed and left the bathroom, leaving his clothes with Ventus's on their beach towels. Vanitas grumpily got into the water, his face displaying how much he was displeased. He hadn't wanted to get in the water, he was fully sure he would've managed to escape by now so he didn't bother bringing anything. Life had other plans obviously. Roxas splashed in Vanitas's direction. "Glad you could join us, grumpy," he said, splashing Vanitas again. Vanitas growled and splashed back, effectively starting a water war with the blond. Vanitas didn't want to admit it, but he was starting to have some fun. Roxas, Ventus, Kairi, Xion, and Naminé kept him pretty busy. 

The night went on, the sun setting to a beautiful mix of colors in the sky. Everyone eventually went back to the shore, Xion announcing to everyone that she brought sparklers. Everyone cheered with the exception of Vanitas, and the sparklers were passed around. Roxas chased Xion around while Naminé and Kairi were making pretty designs in the air with their sparklers. Ventus stuck around Vanitas, trying to cheer him up and making sure he was doing okay. Sora and Riku decided to go on a walk along the shore and Vanitas knew this was it, this was when they'd finally become a couple. He watched as the two walked to the pier and Ventus stood in front of him, handing him another sparkler. "We were gonna take one of those sparkler pictures, come on!" Ventus pulled him along. Vanitas didn't know what to draw and Ventus made sure to tell him not to draw a dick, so that option was out of the question. They all drew stuff, Kairi drawing a heart, Ventus making a star, Vanitas drawing lines that he tried to make look nice, and Naminé took the picture. 

Vanitas couldn't help it. He had too. He looked at the pier where the love of his life stood with someone that wasn't him. His eyes widened as he saw them kiss. He knew Riku liked him back, he knew they'd get together. He knew he shouldn't have looked, but he couldn't turn away. Ventus noticed the look on Vani's face and turned and saw it too. Ventus quickly stood in Vanitas's way, forcing the heartbroken boy to look at him instead of the heartbreakingly romantic scene. He felt it coming up. He couldn't stop it this time. Ventus grabbed Vanitas's wrist and immediately ran in the direction of the bathroom, trying to save Vanitas's secret. Vanitas started coughing, blood and flower petals making a trail to the bathroom. Luckily the others had seen Riku and Sora kiss too, so they were busy squealing and freaking out. Ventus quickly pulled Vanitas into a stall and set him down, leaning him over the toilet. It was a good call since Vanitas's coughing fit got worse, making his stomach do summersaults. "I'll be right back!!" Ventus called as he ran out of the bathroom, trying to bury the blood-and-flower-petal trail in the sand. Vanitas couldn't answer, large flowers getting stuck in his throat, choking him. 

Vanitas did as much as he could to get them out, blood and flowers filling the toilet. He was rather happy no one else was in here. Soon enough he threw up again, the various foods from the picnic leaving his lips, the taste disgusting as it mixed with his blood. Vanitas's body was starting to get pale and he was shaking again. Ventus burst back into the bathroom, quickly running to Vanitas's side. He patted his back and grabbed tissues for Vanitas to wipe his mouth. There was nothing left to throw up yet his body still heaved. His stomach felt like it was beating up all of his other organs, his lungs on fire as more petals, small flowers, and leaves left his airways. He gasped for breath, crying as his eyes stung. Ventus was once again horrified, not knowing if Vanitas was going to die here or not. Vanitas struggled for air, fighting his body, holding onto life. _Just for a bit longer, I can't let Sora's night be ruined!_

Vanitas pulled through, body weak and trembling as he started breathing heavily. "We need to take you to the-" "NO! I'll be fine! I can't ruin it for Sora now," Vanitas's voice was weak and yet strong, hoarse yet clear. He made it crystal clear to Ventus that he wasn't going to let **anything** ruin Sora's night. Ventus at least knew that meant Vanitas wasn't going to let himself die tonight either, since his death day being Sora and Riku's anniversary wouldn't be good for anybody involved. Vanitas slowly pulled himself up, Ventus helping him. "I think you should stay in here a bit longer, Van." Vanitas looked at him, "They'll get suspicious, Ventus, I can't do that." Ventus sighed, starting to get annoyed. He understood that Vanitas loved Sora, but he's literally valuing his own **life** over Sora's confession night. Ventus ignored his growing frustrations, focusing on helping Vanitas clean up. "Wait, stay here. I'll go get our clothes so we can change since now." Vanitas nodded, resting against the sink.

Ventus left the bathroom, quickly grabbing their clothes. "Where's Vani, Ven?" Sora asked, startling the blond. Since when did he get back? He saw Sora's hand intertwined with Riku's and for a second he wished it was Vanitas holding Sora's hand instead. Maybe then Vanitas would be saved. He shook his head, surprised by his own thoughts. "B-Bathroom. I went to get our clothes so we can change," Ven motioned to the clothes. "Is he okay?" Riku asked, a look of worry covering his features. Ventus nodded, "Yeah. Just a regular bathroom trip this time. I went just in case. We'll catch up with you guys in a bit." They nodded and Ventus left to the bathroom, not knowing how he was going to get Vanitas out safely now that they're being affectionate in front of everyone. He found Vanitas standing at the sink, where he'd left him. "Do you need help changing?" Ventus asked the question innocently and Vanitas blushed and glared at him, "I can dress myself!" Ventus realized how that would've meant seeing Vanitas naked and he blushed embarrassed. "I asked because you're weak, dumbass!!"

Vanitas grabbed his clothes from Ventus and made his way to the stall that he cleaned up. "I can do it myself." With that he closed and locked the stall door. Ventus shook his head, once again frustrated with the stubborn ass golden-eyed boy. He went into the stall next over and changed too, waiting outside of Vanitas's stall once he was done. "You're taking a while, are you sure you don't need help?" Vanitas's response came quick and rude as ever, "Shut up! I said I got it!" Ventus rolled his eyes, wondering why he even bothers anymore. Vanitas slowly left the stall and walked to the door. "Am I walking normally?" He turned to the blond. Ventus nodded, "Yeah, nothing odd that I can tell." Vani nodded and left the bathroom, Ventus following. They went back to the group and everyone was getting their clothes to change too. Riku, Roxas, and Sora headed for the bathroom to change until Sora ran back over to Vanitas. 

Sora pulled Vanitas a little away from Ventus and smiled brightly. "I did it, Vani! We're dating!" Vanitas smirked at Sora, trying to be happy for him. "See? I told you, didn't I?" Vanitas kept his tone normal. He's come this far, he can't fuck it up now. Sora nodded and squeezed Vanitas's hands, "Thanks for all of your help, Vani. I really appreciated it. I really needed you and you came through. You're an amazing friend." Ventus winced at Sora's words, looking at Vanitas with worry. Vanitas rolled his eyes, giving Sora a small smile. "Oh shut up, you love-sick idiot." Sora laughed, "But only metaphorically now!" Vanitas nodded. That was true enough. With Riku returning Sora's feelings, Sora was going to be fine now. Riku called for Sora from the bathroom entrance and Sora quickly thanked Vanitas again and ran off to his new boyfriend. "Are you okay, Vanitas?" Ventus sounded concerned. Vanitas nodded, staying silent.

Everyone started packing up when Xion exclaimed, "Guys! There's still enough sparklers for everyone! Let's take a group photo!" Everyone seemed in agreement on it and Vanitas was forced into another photo. Xion set the camera up, apparently poor Naminé didn't know how, so Xion taught her. Everyone posed and drew something in front of them and the camera took the picture. Xion ran over to her camera and looked at the photo. "I am going to get this printed and everyone is getting a copy!" They cheered, once again Vanitas being the exception. Everyone said their goodbyes and got into their respective cars, Sora's plan of leaving with Riku working out. Ventus once again forced Vanitas to be in the passenger seat as he didn't allow Vanitas to drive. Once they were on the road Ventus told him that he was going to spend the night at Vanitas's house. When Vanitas didn't do anything in response Ventus looked at him and felt his heart ache for Vanitas. There he was, the usually cold, stoic boy crying silently, head in his hand as he leaned against the window. Ventus didn't know how to comfort him, deciding that maybe silence was the best option.

Ventus pulled into Vanitas's driveway and parked the car, getting out. He helped Vanitas out of the car and Vanitas told him which key it was. Ventus opened the door and turned back to get the stuff that was still in Vani's car. _Just survive the night, please, body. Do it for Sora. Don't ruin this happy night for him._ Vanitas covered his mouth, knowing what would come next. Ventus went back to the car, grabbing the final things and walked back. His heart stopped. There was Vanitas, lying motionless on the floor, mere steps from the doorway. Blood and large flowers pooled around Vanitas's mouth, and Ventus quickly threw everything down as he dropped to Vanitas's side, pushing him over to look at his face. "VANITAS!!!" Ventus screamed but there was no response. He started crying as he struggled to pick Vanitas up. He rushed back to the car and threw him into the backseat, laying him down. He quickly got into the driver's side and hit the gas. _This can't be happening. Vanitas, please,_ **_please_ ** _hold on!!!_ Ventus, with sobs racking his body and tears blurring his vision, drove like hell to the nearest hospital.

~~~

Vanitas was met with sounds of beeping and crying. He slowly opened his eyes, bright light filling his vision. He groaned lightly, adjusting to the blinding brightness of the room. His eyes locked on Ventus, who was sobbing into Terra's chest as Terra and Aqua comforted him. He looked around, realizing he was in a hospital room. Aqua gasped, "Vanitas?" Ventus quickly looked at him and rushed over, throwing his arms around the boy, still being careful to not move his IVs. Ventus was sobbing so hard his body was trembling and he was starting to hyperventilate. "What happened?" Vanitas didn't seem to remember. He remembered up to Ven opening the door for him and that was it. Nothing but black after that.

"You collapsed!!! I-I knew I sh-should've ta-taken y-you to the hos-hospital since e-earlier!!!" Ventus's sobs were messing up his speech, his deep breaths and gasps causing him to stutter and trip over his words. Vanitas thought about it and realized that was obviously the truth. Why the hell else would he be in the hospital with Ventus in hysterics? Aqua tried to calm Ventus down to no avail. Vanitas gently put an arm around Ventus, not sure what else to do. "Well I'm okay now," he said. _Wait. No. That was wrong. Ventus is gonna get pissed off._ "Yeah fucking right, Vanitas!!! You're beyond medicated right now!!!" Vanitas sighed lightly, knowing that would follow. He coughed up blood and a flower after sighing, noticing how numb and yet in pain his throat was. Ventus only sobbed harder once the flower came out and Aqua tried to at least slip a chair under Ventus so he would at least be a little comfortable. 

Vanitas's coughing fit started seconds after. It was horrible. Blood, flower petals, leaves, and blooming flowers started to cover his chest and lap. By the time it was over Vanitas was left weak and barely breathing. His body was pale and trembling lightly, and he knew his death was imminent. He rubbed Ventus's back, knowing Ventus knew it too. The door swung open, Sora crashing in with tears covering his delicate face. He looked at Vanitas and crashed at his side. Sora was crying hard now, "V-Vanitas….! Y-You never t-told me about this…!"

Vanitas hated hearing Sora's voice sound so broken. He wished he could just make it stop. "Well I couldn't worry you, Sora," Vanitas's own voice was weak and hoarse, a bit of blood spilling from his mouth. Sora cried harder, grabbing Vanitas's hand. He looked into Vanitas's beautiful golden eyes and Vanitas gave him a small smile. That smile was only ever meant for Sora. Sora would be the only person that smile was shown to. That smile belonged to Sora and Sora only. Vanitas felt his last moments creeping up on him and he knew his time was running out. His smile widened and he squeezed Sora's hand, good memories flooding back to him. From the very first time Sora stumbled into his life all the way to now. He remembered how persistent Sora always was. 

_"Why can't you just leave me the fuck alone?!" Vanitas's voice was dripping with annoyance and Sora merely smiled. "Because we are going to be friends, whether you like it or not!"_

At the time, Vanitas had thought that Sora's actions weren't very friendly, forcing him into a friendship he didn't want, but it happened anyway. Sora did it. He managed to become friends with Vanitas, getting his number a few days later. Vanitas's smile only grew as he recalled how happy and excited Sora was when he finally gave him his number. It was like Sora was seeing a puppy for the first time.

Vanitas laughed lightly, squeezing Sora's hand again. "Thank you, Sora, for being such a good friend to me. You really made me happy multiple times. I never thought life could be so cheerful, but you showed me how fun it could be." Sora was sobbing now, both hands tightly grasping Vanitas's. Vanitas turned to Ventus and held his hand too. "Ven, thank you too. I know how much of an ass I am to you. I wish I could have been better to you," Vanitas squeezed Ventus's hand. "Thank you for being there for me, and thank you for caring so much. There were so many times I didn't understand why you still tolerated me. But thank you for keeping me around. Thank you for sticking around too." Ventus's sobbing re-started at Vanitas's words. His throat tightened and he couldn't say anything. Vanitas turned to Sora again, giving him one last smile. It was the brightest smile Sora had ever seen on Vanitas's face and Sora couldn't stop crying. 

"Sora, I will always love you. Please, stay happy for me…"

With that, Vanitas's hands fell limp in the two boys' grips. The biggest and most beautiful flower Sora had ever seen gently bloomed at Vanitas's mouth. Ventus and Sora both started wailing, Sora burying his face in Vanitas's hand. Ventus caught a glimpse of the time and wailed out, "It's midnight…! He did it…! He didn't want to ruin Sora's anniversary….! And he made it to the next day...!!!" Ventus fell weak into Terra's arms as Aqua went to comfort Sora. Sora was crying the hardest he had ever cried before, hands never once letting go of Vanitas's.

~~~

The day was grim. The sun seemed to dim and the clouds seemed to darken. It was the middle of summer, but it seemed the weather knew of the grievances a big group of friends were experiencing. Ventus was crying into Aqua's chest and Sora was crying into Riku's side. The funeral service was long yet Sora felt it wasn't long enough. He stood with Riku to go give his final goodbye to Vanitas, passing by his casket. Sora looked at the pictures and flowers that surrounded Vanitas. The picture from that night at the beach was in the center. The flower that killed the boy was next to him, to be buried with him. A few of the smaller flowers that were extracted from Vanitas's lungs and throat were also around him, vibrant and lively. Sora hated them for stealing Vanitas's life, yet they were now one of the only things he had left of him. Sora stole a flower from next to Vanitas's now pale face. He took another one of the same size and gently placed it in Vanitas's hair, gently running his hand along Vanitas's cheek. He kept the matching one, planning to plant it. He felt that would somehow keep Vanitas with him. His heart ached as he wished things had been different. 

"I'll always love you too, Vanitas. I just wish it was the way you needed." Sora struggled to keep his voice from cracking, Riku tightening his hold on the smaller boy. "Goodbye, Vanitas. Until we meet again." Sora placed a gentle kiss on Vanitas's cheek, wishing that platonic affections would have saved his friend. 

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time ever writing something like this! I personally really love the Hanahaki disease folklore, it makes a pretty great AU. 
> 
> To all my fellow Vocaloid fans, did you catch the Butterfly on Your Right Shoulder reference? I made it pretty obvious lol. I was listening to Teo and Butterfly on Your Right Shoulder when I wrote this. There's this really good version of it that has both Rin and Len's versions playing and it works really well.
> 
> But yeah I suck at writing and Idek if any of you read these notes. But have a nice day/night!


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